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So you want to be a valley girl? Of course you do sissy. I have letters of devotion coming in all the time inquiring about shopping, walking, talking, and especially the attitude. So I’m going to teach you how to walk the walk and talk the talk.
First of all it’s not necessary to be from San Fernando valley like I am. Valley girls exist in every part of the USA. It’s a culture of American girls in their teens and twenties. Let’s not forget it originated long before that. Some 40 somethings may be still “practicing” it. It really got recognition with Franks Zappa’s song “Valley Girl”!
OK now let’s get rad. Rad is valley speak so use it when things are totally awesome. I’ll just valley speak through this whole assignment so pay attention, bimbo!
First of all you have to rent some important movies. “Clueless”, “Waynes World” , and of course “Valley Girl” will give you the valley girl dialect. Like any other language, you have to practice out loud in front of a mirror while you are dressed like a valley girl. Notice how I am dressed in the shortest of skirts, the barest of tanned legs, the cutest of kitten heels, the barest of makeup, and the tiniest of tops. Details like a girlie perfume such as Vera Wang’s Princess or any of Britney Spears scents will do. Silver ankle bracelets, hoop earings, a pink heart shaped watch, diamond rings, rings of pink amethyst, and even a pink amethyst nose stud. Your hair must be blown smooth and straight. Pick your wigs in that fashion…..NO ribbons… ever! Nails must be done in French manicure, toes are always pretty in pink.
I can go on and on about your clothes but, the important thing is valley speak! High rise terminal at the end of every sentence. Use the words “like”, “totally”, “way”, and of course….”as If”. Throw in “whatever”, “duh”, and when you say whatever…a big pause must go in between the words. Like……..what-ever…duh! “Ok” is fill in moments as well as “you know”. Do I have to spell this out for you sissy? Listen to the audio and practice. Then you may be lucky enough to have a valley girl agree to shop at the mall with you one day…emmm…as if!

Princess Britany
1-800-730-3507

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This entry was posted on Saturday, February 6th, 2010 at 3:38 pm and is filed under Sissy Assignments, sissy phone sex, sissy training. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Both comments and pings are currently closed.